Concerned about making an online connection with someone you’ve never met before? There have been times when we’ve all been in that position.
Keep this in mind the next time you’re looking blankly at your phone’s keypad, unsure of what to send. Most people in your life have been complete strangers at one point in time! However, getting past the small chat and into the meat of the conversation can be difficult.
Method 1
Begin by introducing yourself and recalling how the two of you first met.
The last thing you need is for your first message to be ignored because it was spam. If you acquired their number from someone else, this step is critical since your contact information will appear as an unknown number. Keep it short and sweet, or if you met in person, include where you went out for drinks or dinner.
Give an explanation for how you acquired their number if you haven’t spoken to them before. It’s Doug from History 101, by the way. “I got your number from Jane.”
Mention where you met if you did so in person: This am MaryJo from Terri’s party, and I’m here to say hello.
“Hey, it’s John from the hockey game. I know we were just at a game, but there is another tonight that I am going to.”
Method 2
Break the ice with a joke sent through text message.
In order to help you make more interesting and important connections, we’ve put up a guide. Here are ten conversation starters that are sure to get you into a pleasant and flowing text chat with someone new.
Get the discussion going by displaying your sense of humour. Make up a witty joke or a puzzle to get the other person’s attention.
Insert your own lame/semi-lame one liners here. I won’t be responsible for destroying your potential relationship with my sense of humor !
Method 3
Send an amusing meme or animated gif.
Try to find a GIF or meme that connects to the subject matter you’ve been discussing. Use this tactic to start a discussion in a light-hearted and informal manner. If you’re talking to complete strangers, use a meme that relates to the things they’ve mentioned about themselves on social media. It’s okay if you have only met once but you don’t know each other very well, pick a meme connected to the place you first met.
If you are clueless as to their interests, the best bet is to send anything relating to a well-known pop culture phenomena or celebrity that anyone on earth would recognize.
Avoid using memes that contain obscene or derogatory language or anything that might be construed as sending the incorrect message.
Method 4
Ask them for a thought, opinion or suggestion about something.
By eliciting their responses, you can gain insight into their character. Furthermore, having a discussion regarding different points of view gives you the opportunity to discover points of agreement. Asking others questions increases your likeability, according to research. It doesn’t matter what you talk about as long as it isn’t a difficult issue. Avoid having long, in-depth discussions with people so that they don’t feel questioned or under pressure to offer anything intelligent.
“Which film did you view most recently?” “How was it?”
“Where can I get some of the greatest lunch in town?”
“Are there any differences between oat milk and ordinary milk?”
The question is, “How do you enjoy it here so far?”
Method 5
Find out whether they have anything exciting planned for the near future.
This is an excellent tactic for maintaining a good tone in a discussion. You may learn a lot about someone by finding out what they’re looking forward to. The added benefit is that it’s simple to think of follow-up inquiries on upcoming plans and activities thereafter. Plus,they’ll likely return the discussion to you by asking what you have planned. Take a look at these two instances:
“How are your Christmas plans coming along?”
“When you next visit the city, what is your must stop restaurant?”
“How about you? What are your plans for the weekend?”
Inquire about their holiday plans: “Oh, you’re going home for the holidays? Where do you call home?”
Method 6
Mention something the individual enjoys.
If you’ve seen or heard about a particular interest of theirs, go with it. This is a tried-and-true method since people enjoy talking about themselves and their likes and dislikes. In fact, our brain’s reward system fires up when we talk about ourselves.
Mention a familiar pop culture allusion: “Bezos or Musk for your first space flight?”
A good way to learn about someone is to ask about their favourite music or “Who is your favourite actor?”
Use anything from their profile to get their attention: “Did I spy a corgi in your profile picture?
Method 7
Talk about the things you both like.
Start a dialogue based on your common interests and experiences. To begin, look for obvious parallels such as shared birthplaces, educational institutions, and places of employment. For instance, if you’re wearing a hoodie right now and they’re wearing one in their profile photo, you may bring it up.
Make a bond over small things. “That seems like a comfy sweater in your profile picture, do you do hoodies?”
Discuss commonalities such as shared experiences or locations where your paths have crossed: “Woah. Two years before you joined, my brother was on the squad.”
Make reference to a common background: “I grew up in LA too! I was six years old when my family relocated here.”
Consider the following as an example of shared passion: “So you enjoy retro art too ?”
Method 8
Compliment them on their individuality.
Demonstrate your sincerity by being yourself and stimulating the discussion.
Put your own spin on it. In addtion to just making a generic remark on how they look or what they’re wearing, give someone a compliment on something you others would have missed. Recongize them for something they did. Another way to connect with your audience person is to describe how something about them reminds you of another person or item. Earning a compliment is equally satisfying to our minds as getting money.
Try something like this: “I really like the necklace in your bio photo. My sister has one similar to it. Where did you get yours? ”
Honor their efforts by saying something like, “I just wanted to say how much I appreciated you sticking up for Jack at today’s meeting.”
“I’ve never seen anybody handle that many orders in one hand. That’s so pro!”
Method 9
Query about a forthcoming event.
Invite them to assist you with a question you’re facing. A response from them is likely if they have the information you need already, else you can play a guessing game with them to fill in your unknowns.
“What are your thoughts on Rory’s upcoming party? Like … where is it? haha”
“What are we to bringing to tomorrow’s meeing? ”
“I see you enjoy attending music festivals. Next week, I’ll be attending Blues in the Park. Any suggestions on how to get the most out of it?”
“Wow, Europe, that must have been quite a trip?” I’d like to go; any tips for a newbie to Europe?”
“How did Miss Grinch feel about the test results? I clearly wasn’t paying attention, again lol”
“I don’t know,” replies are handled with a “That makes two of us. What is your next best guess for what we should expect?”
Method 10
Mention a non-controversial local happening
Agree on something nice in the news, or on or something that’s currently trending.
The key to answering inquiries regarding current events is to avoid getting too caught up in the details of the event itself. It’s better to lead with a question that elicits an emotional response from the other person in order to maintain their interest. Try to get at the “How do you feel about that?”
Examples of current event inquiries followed by a question about sentiments are provided below:
The question is, “Are you going to watch the game?” they say “yes,” ask “Are you excited?”
“I’m curious what you thought of the concert”, followed up by “How did you feel being so close to the stage?”
It’s alright if they say no to your questions. Switch topics and conversation starters quickly and easily.
Method 11
Ask open-ended, in-depth inquiries to draw out information about the other person.
Go deeper after you have talked for a while. People are looking to make connections with others, so they may be more likely to open up to you about their lives than you expect. When you ask open-ended questions, you offer the other person an opportunity to contribute more and steer the conversation in a direction they’re interested in. It’s been proven in studies that raising inquiries makes a favourable impact on the other person and improves their perception of you as well.
Try making some variations of these questions:
“Which aspect of yourself would you never want to completely change?”
“Cool nickname. How did you get that?”
“When you are done school, any idea of where you might want to live?”
“Do you have a most-special childhood memory?”
Conclusion:
Well, there you have it. 11 good tips to help you through that tough, first texting conversation. We suggest you don’t follow our tips as though they were scripts, but it probably isn’t bad idea to have them onhand when the texting starts. Having a reference close at hand is never a bad idea, so arm yourself with steely resolve and our tips, and head into cyber chat ready to rock! All the best 🙂